So this is why….

When I invite someone over to dinner, etc. I always give a disclaimer.  I’m not the best cook, if a pizza box lands on the table… you’ll know why.  Dana always says to folks that I’m a great cook and I do okay….when nothing goes wrong.  I do have an uncanny knack for burning things and once literally set an entire pot roast on fire (while I had company…thankyouverymuch).  But, for the most part, my cooking is okay.

But then there’s the bad luck part.

I can get through many meals without burning anything, etc but I have the worst luck ever.  I recently stunk up the entire house while using the microwave rice cooker.  I’ve had this thing for years but it picked that day to melt and make the whole house smell like burnt plastic.  I drop things… like an entire entree… or I forget an ingredient and don’t realize it until 2 minutes before guests arrive.

This is all to explain why cooking, having dinner guests, etc tends to make me edgy.  I love people coming over but am terrified over what is about to happen.  Same thing with pot lucks.  Y’all wonder why I bring fruit plates to pot lucks…this is why!!!!!

Fast forward to today.  We wave to all our neighbors, etc but don’t have much of an opportunity to get to know them, etc.  I made pies for everyone (successfully!) for July 4th and that helped us to meet them a bit.  But, holidays like Christmas just seem like a great time to reach out to your neighbors and have an opportunity to establish a relationship with them just a bit more than other times.

So today I baked some cakes.  Plan was to bake 2 cakes, slice them up and make little platters for the neighbors here in the cul de sac, etc.  I baked cake #1 (and I baked it exactly as the directions said… I. SWEAR!!!!) and it burned.  To. a. crisp.  I decided not to panic because I actually thought we’d really need only one cake.  Cake #2 was only as a back up in case I needed it (and history shows that I usually do!).

Cake #2 went just fine.  I baked it for 15 minutes less than the recipe recommended and all was well.  I set it out to cool and made sure it was sitting way back on the counter, etc.  I figured as soon as it cooled I’d put the icing on it, slice it up and make little platters for the neighbors.

I headed into what AG calls “the yarn office” and then I heard a noise.  Went into the kitchen and looked for what was going on.  It took just a moment and then I realized that the dog ate the cake.  Not the burned cake (he didn’t touch that one) but the perfectly fine cake.

And people wonder why I give disclaimers!!!!!!

2 responses

  1. Set a pot roast on fire? Honey, that’s a skill. ;^)

    I once used salt in place of sugar in pumpkin pies for Thanksgiving. Twenty years later and I still get teased about that one. /sigh

  2. My mother dropped the whole roasted turkey on the sidewalk one Thanksgiving. She was bringing it to my aunt’s house (the aunt’s oven was not big enough).
    I’m a nervous cook too when I have company – It doesn’t seem to matter how many holidays I have cooked. By the time dinner is on the table, I could use a valium!

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